One thing to be aware of (this tripped me up when I started): if you are running the ASCOM device hub (or POTH), you shouldn't connect Stellarium directly to the telescope. If you do that you would have two programs both trying to control the telescope and they will conflict.
Instead, you run the ASCOM device hub first, and then all your other programs connect to the hub. The hub "pretends" to be a telescope, and it passes on all the instructions from the other programs. This way, you can have SharpCap, Stellarium, and any other programs all sharing a connection to the same telescope.
After you run the Device Hub, when you go in to set up a new telescope in Stellarium you'll see Device Hub Telescope (or something similar) appear as a telescope option - connect to that instead of the iExos100.
I believe POTH works in the same way, although Device Hub had already replaced it by the time I started.
Forgive me if this is obvious and you're already doing it. But your parking/unparking problem sounds exactly the same as what I had before I realised this - and was my prompt to discover I was doing it wrong!